Rules for the Thriller Heroine (so as not to receive the Too Stupid to Live award)

Posted January 23, 2019 by Shari in I Dare You Event / 16 Comments

Tags:

When your life has already been threatened, do not, under any circumstances, leave a safe location to strike out on your own telling no one (even if, no, most especially if, the villain tells you to tell know one).  You will most assuredly be captured or killed and you will force others to do unsafe things to restore you to safety.

If you must chase after the bad guys and you are intelligent enough to take back-up, do not under any circumstances, hare off on a side trail because you saw or heard something and leave your back up help behind.  See results in Rule #1.

I know it’s tough, especially when you’re around a bunch of macho men and maybe some macho women, but do not assume- because you’ve been around them or because you took one little two hour course in self-defense at the community center or one trip to the gun range- that you are now She-Ra and can take on a fully armed and highly skilled villain, gang, or army.  See results in Rule #1

Now, I hate to get indelicate, but needs must and all.  Sadly this must be said. When you are running for your life with that hot and sizzlingly attractive danger buddy, do not stop and drop (this is what you do when set on fire, not scratching an itch) to the sand, the jungle floor, or any other convenient flat surface to have a quicky or five impossible rounds (no one, not even the most spry individual has that kind of endurance).  You will most definitely lose the mood, might even get a rash or bit by an insect or other wild creature. Oh, and you might be unlucky enough for worse (see the results in Rule #1).

And, one more thing, heed the warning.  I refer to any advice delivered from your friends and acquaintances who have training, skills, and experience in dealing with a dangerous situation or villains of any stripe. They really do know what they are talking about and your craving to defy a person you secretly have the hots for or your deep need to prove yourself as strong and independent (see Rule #3) will only end badly (see result for Rule #1).

There, that ought to get our intrepid thriller heroines started.
So, what about you, any TSTL Survivor Rules you can impart to a thriller heroine?
Have any examples of TSTL or the smart heroines you want to share?

The following two tabs change content below.
Shari is the Delighted Reader. Married to her Prince Charming and mother to two Princesses and one Prince. When she is not slaving away as Cinderella she loves to get lost in the pages of a good book. Never without a reading device and a few good paperback books, because she never knows when she might get 5 minutes to read!

16
Leave a Reply

avatar
8 Comment threads
8 Thread replies
1 Followers
 
Most reacted comment
Hottest comment thread
9 Comment authors
chucklesthescotCarole @ Carole's Random Life in BooksLornaSophia RoseCarole rae Recent comment authors
  Subscribe  
newest oldest most voted
Notify of
Reese
Guest
Reese

I’d like to add something simple but that many heroines have trouble with: do NOT take phonecalls with your back to the door! that leaves the villain the perfect opportunity to come up behind you and take you out, probably while your friend is giving you essential info (often the fact that your backup is in fact the bad guy)

Sophia Rose
Guest

Oh, yep, I can tell you’ve read a few good twisty thrillers with that observation. Good one.

Kimberly @ Caffeinated Reviewer
Guest

Yes to all of this! What fun!

Sophia Rose
Guest

LOL, yeah, it was all a good bit of fun to put the list together. 🙂

Adriana Reyes
Guest

Oh man I need to do this for romance heroines ASAP. I’ve run into a rash of TSTL heroines lately and they have me grinding my teeth!

Sophia Rose
Guest

Don’t they just drive you insane and want to make you reach inside the book and shake them? 🙂

Mary Kirkland
Guest

I’ve watched enough Horror films to know what NOT to do. lol

Sophia Rose
Guest

Haha! Yes! The Horror movie survivor lists are the best. My brother has a t-shirt with some Horror Film rules on it.

Carole rae
Guest

All the yesses!!!!!

Sophia Rose
Guest

Seriously, some of these heroines can drive me nuts. 🙂

Lorna
Guest

Not exactly the same thing but I once read a book for an author and the heroines child goes missing on a trip to the big city. On the way to said city, the heroine and hero stop along the side of the highway to scratch that itch. I about went ballistic. Needless to say I refused to review the book!

Sophia Rose
Guest

Yeah, that is not a dangerous situation, but NOT Cool for a mom. I’d be done with her, too.

Carole @ Carole's Random Life in Books
Guest

Most of these seem like common sense…now if we could just get all of those heroine’s to follow these rules.

Sophia Rose
Guest

Haha! Yeah, it seems like common sense, but I swear a large percentage of romance heroines are guilty of breaking the rules. I suppose it gives us the action parts, but, yeah…

chucklesthescot
Guest

I see way too many dumb heroines in my horror and apocalypse books too. The obsession with finding someone to have sex with when someone is trying to kill you or your compound is surrounded by zombies really annoys me!

Sophia Rose
Guest

Yes!!! I have no idea how they can even be in the mood. 🙂