Yakkety Yak Let’s Chat – What’s happened to the comments?

Yakkety Yak...Let's Chat

I love comments. So much at one point in time I tried creating challenges to get more comments on our site and some other sites. Getting into discussions, learning new things about someone, having fun. To keep it all safe from spam I employe a few plugins instead of spending all day deleting spam comments. But what happens when a reader makes comments that you find not very nice?

That’s what today’s Yakkety Yak is about…respecting authors with your comments. Let’s give an example:

We recently had an author on the site for an interview and a review of her book. Nothing new, but we opened our doors to this author and expected her to be a guest here. A reader comes along and writes a very rude, cryptic comment that left me offended and embarrassed that the author was treated this way. I debated long and hard on it. Consulted Sophia Rose and got some background information. Then I decided to delete the comment. Yep, delete it.

So is that a wrong thing to do? Everyone has an opinion, right? Well, I draw the line at being rude and nasty to an author. I don’t care if you don’t like their book, cover, characters or the dress they are wearing, you keep it respectful. You can word you comments in a way that don’t outright attack the author. This is the first time I have outright deleted a comment.

At Delighted Reader we respect authors. We may not like their books, but we don’t bash them as a person. We may not like the cover of their book, many times I haven’t, but I don’t attack the author for not doing a better job. I say what I don’t like or what confused me and make it constructive rather than destructive. But but but…I do not go out saying horrible things with a mic drop ending to it (yes, the comment included a mic drop ending). Well, the mic drop is the end of it and I well….deleted the comment. *Mic drop*

Do I feel great about doing this? No, absolutely not, but in the end I will protect the image I want portrayed about my blog. Hint: it’s MY BLOG. I feel bad as it was their opinion, but then again, as my mama said “If you can’t say something nice, then don’t say anything.”

So please don’t take this that you can’t disagree with me, because that is not my intent. I want comments. I want people to disagree with me. I want the discussion. But it has to be civil and in no way a personal attack.

Keep the comments coming! And I will keep responding. We will have wonderful discussions and so much fun!

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Shari is the Delighted Reader. Married to her Prince Charming and mother to two Princesses and one Prince. When she is not slaving away as Cinderella she loves to get lost in the pages of a good book. Never without a reading device and a few good paperback books, because she never knows when she might get 5 minutes to read!
  • What a great discussion and its something to keep in mind while commenting. I think everyone has an opinion but you need to be respectful about it too!! Even if I read a book I may not like from a author, I always try to be as positive as I can be while being honest. Good for you for deleting that comment. So far I haven’t had one negative except when it comes to a cover 🙂 but not one where it would be offensive and rude. My Momma said the same thing to me and if I ever did what this commenter did I wouldn’t be able to sleep at night. I do think this is pretty vital to remember to comment.

    • Shari Delighted Read

      I appreciate everyone’s comments and opinions, but I also want things to be respectful. This is a slander site and I won’t let it go that way. The person that made the comment has walked a fine line a few times, but I had to make a statement of what is not allowed. The comment was on a cover and yes, it wasn’t the greatest of covers, but they were disrespectful in their comments rather than constructive, so I had to delete it.

  • I have never had to delete a comment on my blog, Shari, but with a personal attack, or one that was just plain rude, I wouldn’t hesitate to do so, either. It is our blog, and we can make sure the atmosphere we want is the one we get.

    Like you, if I don’t like a book, I state why, with examples, and I never bash the author – however, I have bashed some characters sometimes… But they’re not real, and if they kept on being very mean and narrow-minded in their story, I felt that I could also not hold back in my dislike for them.

    Great post! Have a wonderful week ahead and happy reading.

    Lexxie @ (un)Conventional Bookviews

    • Shari Delighted Read

      I agree Lexxie, this was the first time I have had to do this and I thought long and hard before I did it. The cover comment was just plain mean and I would rather they have made a comment on it explaining in a constructive way why they disliked it rather than mic dropping the comment. Oh, well.

      Thank you for commenting!

  • Omg I hope it wasn’t me! I can never hold in cover snark

    • Shari Delighted Read

      Please be respectful when commenting on a cover. It is ok to say you don’t like it but tell us why without making it a rude comment to the author.

  • Hey if it’s me, please shoot me an email and let me know.

    I got a little paranoid and miffed over something similar. A few weeks back, this author whom I love and follow but has a series that isn’t for me, did a virtual book tour. One of the stops is in a blog I follow so I left a one liner comment saying that it looks so angsty I’ll probably tear my hair out. After a few days, I got a DM from the author saying I’m not obliged to read the book… It got me defensive and also agreeing with her in that I KNOW I”M NOT OBLIGED to. At the same time, I also don’t think that my comment was disrespectful… maybe. It’s all subjective but to nip whatever issue is looming, I apologized and took note of the situation.

    • Shari Delighted Read

      No it wasn’t you! Your comments are well articulated!

      What you said was not disrespectful. You said what you felt and why you felt that way. You didn’t do a mic drop. You didn’t just say it was horrible. That is what happened and the mic drop part was what ticked me off.

      No worries! I have read horrible books, but I say why not saying the author is a horrible persona and should jump off a cliff. That isn’t want I want for my blog, so it isn’t going to be something I let happen.

  • I’ve had to delete a few comments on my blog. I won’t put up with name calling or saying a book is awful just because an author is a certain religion *Yes that happened*. I leave comments and say things like not my type of book but it sounds like others will like it. Or I don’t read this genre but thanks for the post. But yes, I agree, if a comment is rude..there’s no need to keep the comment. Rude people suck.

    • Shari Delighted Read

      Your comments are respectful. I don’t like historical romances or Jane Austen books, but I don’t bash them as a person. They just aren’t my thing. I recently said why I don’t like New Adult books…because I have teenage daughters and reading about young people having sex creeps me out. Nothing against those authors as that is my hang up.

      So I am going to be more vigilant in letting people tear down authors on my site.

  • dholcomb1

    Agreed, it’s not okay to insult invited guests.

    denise

    • Shari Delighted Read

      Thank you Denise!

  • I agree, you can give your opinion, but no need to be rude about it. If someone doesn’t think a book is for them or they don’t like the cover I don’t mind them saying so, but I also would draw the line at rude comments as well or where the author gets attacked. You can still work your comment politely instead of attacking. I don’t think I have ever deleted a comment, only a few that I marked as spam or wasn’t 100% as they were so weird, but I think I only deleted one comment or so, so far.

    I love comments and I had a few comments where I wasn’t really sure what to do with or how to reply or thought it was a bit weird, but in most cases people are polite and I have no reason to actually delete it. But if a comment is rude and nasty and you feel uncomfortable with it I agree it’s your place to delete it. It’s still your blog. It’s just common courtesy to not be rude and especially not insult an author. Be honest and share your opinion, but be nice about it. I am sorry you got a rude comment on your blog and I hope it won’t happen again!

    • Shari Delighted Read

      Thank you Lola. I try to keep things polite here. The person who did this still comments and I monitor their comments closely any more.

  • You did the right thing Shari. If someone has an opinion they can do so without being rude. This is your blog and if you want it to be inviting and a friendly place to chat books so be it. Look at all of us..asking if it was us….see we all want the blogs to be a happy place,

    • Shari Delighted Read

      I respect opinions, but they have to be respectful in return. It’s my blog and I am going to keep it polite 🙂

  • I would have deleted it too. You can get your points across without being rude and disrespectful. People need to learn how to respect other folks space.

    • Shari Delighted Read

      Thanks Sharonda! I am tired of the world that disrespects everything. I just want everyone to love everyone at this point!

      • I’m right there with you Shari

  • You did the right thing. You can disagree with someone without being mean or rude. Like you said, this is your blog, you can do what you want on it. It is your right to delete comments you don’t agree with. It is even worse when you have a guest author on. If I didn’t like the author, I would just not comment, I wouldn’t leave a disrespectful comment.

    Melanie @ Hot Listens & Rabid Reads

    • Shari Delighted Read

      I can disagree without being rude. I have tried very hard to correct this person, but I may have to block them forever soon.

      • That is very sad, but you must do what you need to do. You don’t need that kind of hatred in the blogging world. There is enough hatred without it infiltrating our hobby. I’m sorry that this is happening to you.

  • Shari Delighted Read

    Ok, looks like someone deleted their comment after I responded. Sorry for that, but it is my blog and I will keep things polite at all times.

  • Debbie Haupt

    You definitely did the right thing Shari, it is your blog and I also hate author bashing. I’m lucky that I’ve never had to delete a post like that.

  • I completely agree with deleting the comment. A rude comment on your own post is bad enough, and I think you’d have to right to delete it then as well, though there could be arguments for keeping discourse open or whatever. However, a rude comment on a guest post has to go. Obviously you did not invite someone to your blog to be insulted, and I think making sure they never have to see the comment is the way to go.